Wednesday, January 29, 2014
Tuesday, January 28, 2014
Words of Wisdsom from Wanda Draper, "When you are at the end of your rope________!"
Words of Wisdom from Wanda Draper,
"When you are at the end of your rope; tie a knot!"
Words of wisdom from Wanda Draper; "When You are at the end of your rope______!"
Words of wisdom from Wanda Draper; "When you at the end of your rope tie a knot!"
Post navigation « Next in Healing: Anger is fear draped in self protection.
Next in Healing: Anger is fear draped in self protection.
Anger is fear draped in self protection.
So simple, now I know it seems.
I swear a path of redirection
To handle these rips, tears and seams.
So simple, now I know it seems.
I swear a path of redirection
To handle these rips, tears and seams.
Walls built up!
Trumphets sounded, like Jerricho,
Shall with God’s help, crumble!
Again, I shall laugh and shout with joy.
Trumphets sounded, like Jerricho,
Shall with God’s help, crumble!
Again, I shall laugh and shout with joy.
How long have I clung to anger?
For in reality it was my fear!
Personal power must be guarded so not to languish
In this matter, one must learn boundary setting saving one from anguish.
For in reality it was my fear!
Personal power must be guarded so not to languish
In this matter, one must learn boundary setting saving one from anguish.
Parents drinking, being drunk or driving like,
Isn’t kind, remember we had or have no button of rewind for if.
What example given is what was seen.
Reading this? I plead step up for yourself and especially your kids.
Isn’t kind, remember we had or have no button of rewind for if.
What example given is what was seen.
Reading this? I plead step up for yourself and especially your kids.
If your parent(s) drank
Your heart sank
To call them alchoholic.
Remember none are perfect before visit re-scolding.
Your heart sank
To call them alchoholic.
Remember none are perfect before visit re-scolding.
You cannont fix all.
Learn to relax.
Some must learn
This, while others easily disearn.
Learn to relax.
Some must learn
This, while others easily disearn.
Other hurts?
They smart!
Rip them open.
Healing you have chosen.
They smart!
Rip them open.
Healing you have chosen.
Now let go of old self protection modes.
New ways, directions place and releases;
Shall find you new safety
Of which only God gives.
New ways, directions place and releases;
Shall find you new safety
Of which only God gives.
This will rid you of your fear!
Finally get you in gear.
Find you in touch
with God, and yourself! VERY MUCH.
Finally get you in gear.
Find you in touch
with God, and yourself! VERY MUCH.
The realization that;
Anger is but fear
Cloaked in self protection,
Is a truth of freedom setting.
Anger is but fear
Cloaked in self protection,
Is a truth of freedom setting.
Monday, January 27, 2014
eaky Parenting Tips Handed Down Mother to Daughter
Honoring my mother here will help you with some original parenting tips; I promise. Do you have an extremely difficult time getting your children from young ages to teens to do work around the house? Have to justify to the younger ones why the older one's get more money?
My mother's system is full prove. Mom gave us age appropriate tasks. Here comes the trick. Tell the kids, "Any money you find you can keep!" This system serves as a tracking and monitoring system. If your memory is lacking; write down where, how much money and the task assigned to each child. If all the money is gone, then the child should have cleaned well. You have to hide it good enough to get the results you want. Design the task so it is fair for the child's ability. We were motivated to do the chores for what ended up to be our allowance. Mom is quite an inventive lady.
Mom's of teens that are driving and have a curfewcurfew; want to know what time they come up but not sit up and wait on them? Are you a light sleeper or at least you can wake up if a pop bottle is kicked over?Tricky mom used to put out two to three litter bottles of cokes right in the walking pathway of coming in the door. You would have to kick them over in the dark. The noise would wake mom up so she could look at the clock and deal with you the next morning. You can bet she did deal with us if it was after curfew when we snuck in under cover of dark instead of on time turning the lights on.
Want a car game that everybody can play, even the driver? This game is obscure in origins. We grew up on it as we traveled all over the US and Canada. Zip-Zip is what we called it. The idea was to get as many horses as one could. If you said zip-zip,it was a group of horses and you were first then those horses were yours. A white horse counted as two. If you ziped a cow you lost all your horses. This may seem weird but wheever anybody saw a cementary the first to call out slppsky got everybody's horses. You can divide the teams into front seat and back seat or boy's against the girls. Better yet think of some way you want to divide teams your way. It is competitive and funny.
I was the youngest in the family. Often nobody wanted me to be on their team. You guessed it; I zipped a lot of cows being eager to win. One time I saw a mountain lion chained lying underneath a car. Learning my lessons, I screamed, "Is that horse? Is that a horse daddy?"
My dad couldn't believe his eyes. We stopped and talked with the owner. I even got to pet it that day. I have to admit that is a strange event. I had never seen a mountain lion but I didn't loose my horses that day
Did you like my "Hand Me Down Tips From My Mom?" I may make this an event giving more of her secrets. Then again I might want to keep her wisdom to myself. Lots of great stuff from my mom!
This can be seen on my blogs too but was posted her on Bloggy Mom's first!
"MOP MONSTER" BY SNEAKY MOM NOW SNEAKY GRANDMA AGE 85
"Mop Monster," came out when Mom wanted to clean the floors but had a 7 year old, 6 year old, 4 but almost year old, and 1 almost 2 year old around to deal with under foot.
The couch became a magnificent ocean going Sailing Vessel we might call the "Mallo." It would have to put all the sails to the West or East. Then maybe to the North or South depending on the whim of the "Mop Monster."
The Mom Monster would occasionally rise up and step by step work its way up the "Mallo." The spirit behind the "Mop Monster" was rutheless and fun. It was out mother playing with us.
She, Dorothy Mallo, had to clean the house and get all those little feet to stay in one place at a time. This way by playing with them and thinking up the character of "Mop Monster," she accomplished house cleaning and play time all at once. Not bad for a mother of 4 to do all in one day.
I can't rememeber how many times the tangles of the "Mop Monster" scared us on to have some of the best times of our lives. Mom could think up many things like the "Mop Monster," to get what she needed done. But what was nicest of all was she found ways to do them while spending time with her family. That makes her an Ace among mom's of all generations.
I challenge moms every where to do better than "Mop Monster!"
Friday, January 24, 2014
Disability Doesn't Have To Be Debilitating
Disability doesn't have to be debilitating. Disability only means finding a different approach or way around life's curves. One must find a way to get to the end of the road by hopping, using a cane, wheelchair or being carried by God.
How many people without arms have learned to drive, paint, write or other with their feet? Technolgy has made it
easier for us now more than ever before in history. What is stopping you from going forward? What is stopping you from helping
your son, daughter, grandaughter, student, or patient? Do you make excuses for them? Do you let the stagnate? High
expectations will help them reach their full potential.
My husband and I have gone head to head on these questions over and over. I tend to be the pusher and my
husband the "Disney Dad." That is all well and good if you have a child that can reach his full potential through learning
from others. A special needs child or differently abled child needs even sterner goals and directions in my opinon.
My son is an only child. There are no close relatives that can monitor his progress or look in on him once his parents are gone. He will be on his
own once my husband and I die. My son has shown me over and over he is capable. Go and get a copy of Wanda
Draper's book, "YOUR CHILD IS SMARTER THAN YOU THINK!" She is an internationally know Child Development
Specialist.
Expectations are what you will get from your children. My son can wash his clothes, vacuum, unload the
diswasher, or baically any household chore. When it comes to mowing the yard or other chore that deals with a male
oriented task ( my husband interfered on me showing him); my son, Tanner, is at a lose as how to proceed.
Do you know why my son can do the things I mentioned above? I showed him how to do them. You can do this too.
Now I will insert the story of an 85 year old premie child that wasn't supposed to be according to her doctor's when
she was born and through a few life events. My mother, Dorothy Mallo, was born early before the fullterm of a
pregnancy. One way to give you an idea of how small she was is to tell you they used my grandfather's hankerchiefs for
diapers because nothing else seemed to fit. Dorothy was born with a club foot and the growth in one leg had to be
stopped because one leg had stopped growing.
Dorothy had many surgeies at the Shriner's Hospital's. This meant spending a year away from home. Dorothy
often had to walk to school on crutches. Did it ever occur to her or her family she was disabled and completely debilitated?
Apparently not!
Dorothy went on to graduate from high school and then on to Secretary College (which now I understand would be
the equivalent of an Associates Degree). Dorothy continued to work, marry, have four children and do many things
that any normal person did.
How come these issues didn't beat her down? What did Dorothy do that many others would not? What is the
formula for keeping your disabilites from making you debilitated?
Could it be attitude? Your family support system? I feel these are part of the answer. I also know it has to do
with the times. I think society makes more excuses for people with disabilites and has lowered expectations. They give
the lowest of jobs to these kids on Individual Educational Plans sometiimes; and on Employee Plans with Voccational Rehab plans.
Remember Dorothy the next time you let your disability hold you back. My mom has never let her disabilities stop
her from doing anything she wanted to do in life. I hold her up as an example to many.
*****This is the first appearance of this Blog Post in any medium. If you see it reposted....It was posted here @ Bloggy moms.com first.
Friday, January 17, 2014
Going Forward With Positive Thinking From An Alcoholic History
I am told coming from an alcoholic family,
Has its repercussions damming with damage.
Whether we like it or not it is applicable,
Adult children of any type of alcoholic, funtional or other, a misnomer?
Has its repercussions damming with damage.
Whether we like it or not it is applicable,
Adult children of any type of alcoholic, funtional or other, a misnomer?
How can an alcoholic be functional,
When he/she leads and leaves a dysfunctional unit?
Confusing you see these words applied to me and mine.
Accept them readily I wouldn't but that was my determination.
When he/she leads and leaves a dysfunctional unit?
Confusing you see these words applied to me and mine.
Accept them readily I wouldn't but that was my determination.
The worlds used to describe "codependent."
As others, instead of "barely surviving,"
Mislead, shame people with titles of dysfunctional.
No one wants to be outside society or outcast!
As others, instead of "barely surviving,"
Mislead, shame people with titles of dysfunctional.
No one wants to be outside society or outcast!
Sad to see all the titles,
Leading people away from help.
For many yelp and yelp in pain.
Not wanting the nobility of dysfunctional, codependent or such things.
Leading people away from help.
For many yelp and yelp in pain.
Not wanting the nobility of dysfunctional, codependent or such things.
Survivior is a name,
That many could play the game,
Of this famed title,
Alchoholism, and the train wreck left behind.
That many could play the game,
Of this famed title,
Alchoholism, and the train wreck left behind.
Going on,
Forward to positive thinking,
Would only,
Require calling the rose not a rose!
Forward to positive thinking,
Would only,
Require calling the rose not a rose!
Once the process take s hold,
There is hope for the bold.
Oh how simple words or word play,
Can change the mighty or the mouse.
There is hope for the bold.
Oh how simple words or word play,
Can change the mighty or the mouse.
Lesson learned must also be realized.
Funny how they have been heard.
Yet, the deaf ears ignored.
The approach and contenance make all the difference in the world.
Funny how they have been heard.
Yet, the deaf ears ignored.
The approach and contenance make all the difference in the world.
Anger Plus Fear to Acceptance and Healing
Learning to Heal
Age 51 almost 52.
Now to declare,
A child no more.
Taken plenty of years, prayers and therapy.
Crazy ideas.
I thought I could do!
Releases frozen and failure to now have pleasure.
Self traps, wrong impressions and conclusions.
Why I ask did I task,
Over little insignificant outside worry,
Always in a hurry,
Do deny there was a problem I was basking in?
Fear of shouting,
Fear of fighting,
Desire to protect,
Redirected and caused me to project.
A facade
of control
to extent
nerves serverly contracted.
If only this and that,
Have backup for a backup,
Smooth running, No yelling,
Happiness! Everyone is Pleased!
Knotted stomach,
Feelings of being unsafe.
Not my child(ren),
I will guard them against the hazards of life!
Never would I have imagined,
What turned up.
No one ever can guess being resigned
To discover a life's frighting nightmare.
Playing fair but then I stare,
Right into my upbringing and it is declared;
The definition pertains to specific relations,
As many proclaim they judge but must not withstand the same tribulations.
How I got to this point,
And out of joint,
Seems null and void,
No longer can I deny,
Learning to heal,
Is understanding how to feel,
Recognize accept,
Deal with the emotions wheel!
Through the process,
Rethink the embarrasement,
Learn no shame,
For that I had no control.
Understanding victimization,
Circumstances lead to stituations,
Giving or surrending my power,
Yet, it is my time to tower.
To start fresh,
I must declare,
This is a stretch, of change committed.
I will not bare any more personal excuses.
Forward in my life, I go, looking on the fresh vision,
I will define.
Now let me regain,
I have a brain, am not lame, prancing on to delight.
This series will be the story of my learning curve to healing. That means dealing with with an alcoholic background that doesn't fit the norm. My home was filled with love but dysfunction. Promises made were kept. Codepency and addiction are words that bother me. For they seem they must coexist. I am not addicted to drugs and seldom drink alcohol. I swore that evil of a devil would never coexist around my child(ren).
The truth is I have some bones to dig up and rebury in a correct final resting place. I do this for no one but myself. Except I guess I do it for my son.
On top of this I have to admit my marriage has some extra irriatations that must be fleshed out. This goes the gambit.
If this were not enough, I have an anger issues from a brain issues that is now apparent whether I like it or not. Learning to hold my tongue and see it is hard. Taking medication for conditions I was programed to see as an embarrasement is as they say going to take some getting over. But miserable is a lumpy couch that gets worse with time.
Part of this is a recording for myself. Another is a pledge to my family. Still I pray and hope this might hit a cord with a fellow. Stop it while you can before half you life had been lived. Trust me my therapist has spent a few years getting me to even talk. If this story makes you think....It might save you time, money and heartache. If it does, I will have served the purpose God had in mind.
Ollamok
Wrong Reasons To Marry Right Reasons to Divorce or Stay Married
http://ollamok.com/2013/12/22/wrong-reasons-to-marry-writing-right-reasons-stay-married/
Detest Theory of Mind which is only a theory
http://ollamok.com/2014/01/17/theory-of-mind-is-blown-what-next-basically-states-autistics-unaware-of-others-emotions/
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